Mister.

Tonight my cat Mister passed away.

While my boyfriend and I were eating dinner, my mother called.

Impromptu calls are normally do not offer any good news, and this call wasn’t any different.

When I heard her voice for the first time, it was shaky and broken.

She explained to me through tears that the family was at the vet.  Mister had become completely lethargic and immobile, and seemed to be in some pain.

I imagined our 17 year-old cat lying on the table with Mom, Dad, and Steven gathered frantically around him.

My family has always loved our animals with the deepest parts of our hearts, and Mister probably held our strongest devotion, because he was our first pet.

Dad was a supervisor of a processing cannery when I was young.  Often he would bring home treats – homemade tamales, children’s gifts, and tons of ketchup.

One day he brought home a big box with a kitten inside—a black and white mess with gold eyes who possessed the ability to make us all fall in love.  I remember begging mom to let him sleep with me every night.

One of my favorite memories is on one of those nights I placed him in bed with me.  I reached up to turn on my ceiling fan, and it made a loud whiiiir.  Suddenly the poor cat fell face first from fright back into his box on the floor.  Poor little traumatized Mister.

And so I sat, reminiscing, choked up with tears in the corner of a restaurant while my childhood pet and friend was dying on a table without me there.

Mom put her phone up to his ear for me, “I love you, Mister.  I’m sorry I’m not there,” I said, trying not to sob.  “You were a good cat.”

“I love you,” I whispered again. “You were a good cat.”

I was in pain and panic because the night previous to this my boyfriend told me there is no Heaven for animals.

I don’t know what made me ask him, but I know immediately that I regretted it.  Every childhood pet, every piece of love I had ever known was suddenly nonexistent?  They weren’t in Heaven?  My heart broke upon hearing that, and it certainly didn’t make tonight any easier.

There has to be a pet Heaven.  There has to be something for the precious, precious treasures that God has given us.  They must know something of God’s love, too?  I can’t imagine them not having a soul.  Just being a “consciousness.”

They cry, they hurt, they can be happy, they can love—how can there be no Heaven for them?

I prayed enormously to God last night that my boyfriend is wrong.  I prayed while sitting on the phone, distressed, and insane, Please God, please tell me You have a special place for my cat.  Please tell me that You are holding him right now and You love him.  Please love him.  Please love him.  Please love him.

Maybe I prayed for all the wrong things, I don’t know.  I do know that I prayed from the heart—more desperately than I have done in a long time.

I just can’t understand why there wouldn’t be a special place for them.

In What Dreams May Come, there is a flashback when the family is putting their pet to sleep.  The young girl isn’t happy at all.

“So you’re going to kill my dog?”

“Yes, I’m going to help her die.”

“Where will she go?”

“She’ll go where we all go…and how can that be bad?”

At the end of our evening, I asked my boyfriend, “Is my cat in Heaven?”

He hesitated, supposedly knowing the true answer.  “I can’t say that.”

“Then what can you say?” I urged.

“He’s in a better place,” which reminded me of that moment in the movie, where there was comfort in knowing that there was a place.

“There’s nothing in the Bible that specifically says animals don’t go to Heaven?” I asked him.

“No.”

“Then they could go to Heaven?”

“It’s possible.”

Tonight on a friend’s Facebook I read, “God orchestrates the impossible.”

So, if God makes all things possible, then all things are possible.

Mister is with Him now.  I believe that.  My heart won’t let me believe anything else.

A Poetic Prayer

Lord Undo Me

I don’t really worship these day
I don’t really stand up to praise you with songs
Or prayers or actions
or with anything
I am full of all the right moves
I am full of all the right words
I am full of all the right religion
But it is all just illusion
I am really
Lonely
Lost
Calloused
Jaded
Cynical
Too religious
Too realistic
and well really just too lazy
to worship you anymore
I have lost my first love
I have lost the joy of your presence
But most of all I have lost the fear of your glory

Father I need to see you again
Like Isaiah I want to stand in awe of your glory
To fall down at your feet
To come face to face with your
Perfection,
Radiance,
Goodness,
Holiness,
Awesomeness
I want to stand before you and see you for who you are
and me for who I am
I want to be undone

I want to know me for who I really am
I want to see the depths of my heart
And know that you are the only way
You are the only truth
You are the only life
I want to see me and understand
What it really must have taken for you to
Love me
Care for me
See me
Speak to me
Want me
Communicate with me
Die for me
Die for me
Die for me

Lord, I want to stand in that place where all I can see is your glory
And my sin
Because in that place I can’t help but worship you.
Lord let me come undone
Undo my heart
Lord, undo my heart
break down these walls that I love so much
No, wait don’t,
I’m scared I don’t know if I can handle this
don’t
But I can’t live this way anymore
I can’t stand here in this half-life
this going through the motions life
this not really alive life
Father, I need you so come in and do what you must
Cut out the tumor on my heart
Break down the walls that I love
Lord let me come undone
Undo my heart
let me worship you again

Blake Williams

Game of Numbers

If all I am is a number, then forget it.

We recently celebrated YAC’s one year anniversary.  I saw this on its Facebook page:

Three hundred people.  So we’re a Spartan army?  Wrong.

Three hundred people in the database.

I was told that the count on our anniversary Sunday was 116 people.

One hundred and sixteen.  Only.

On a normal Sunday, our count is a rounded 80.

That means on any given Sunday, we’re missing 220 people.  Where are they?

Sure, we can celebrate numbers.  But where is the real celebration if more than half of those who have come once never come again?

Is that anything to celebrate?

Radio State-of-Mind

In my car, my radio is constantly tuned to K-LOVE.

Why it happens, I don’t know, but some mornings there is unusual static.  It drowns out the positive encouragement.

When it happens, I normally turn to a pop station or sometimes play a CD.

So this morning when all I heard was static, I switched the station.

“So, listeners, call in and tell us how many states have you na-na’ed in.”

I instantly recognized the voice as Maney’s and was instantly dispirited.

Na-na is the Memphis radio-personality's air-friendly way of saying sex.  I didn’t find it too friendly.

My view on sex has changed so significantly within the last few months.  It’s supposed to be special.  Our bodies are temples, designed to experience that act with our husbands and wives.

To hear it on the air so freely was a complete turn-off.  It made me realize how much I’ve changed, and what exactly I want for myself.  I flipped through the other stations not wanting to listen to Maney anymore.

I settled on a country station, knowing that songs about unrequited love were much safer for me than uninhibited conversations about past sins and present struggles.

You were formerly darkness, but now you are light in the Lord; walk as children of light (Ephesians 5:8).

Real Let Down

Tonight is our second round of the Real Discipleship at Hope.

Last Wednesday a few of us met with a large group in the South Hall.

There, Craig gave us a survey of Genesis and Exodus.

For the larger portion of the evening I was tuned out, doodling on the pages of my notebook.  I sat trying to ignore my irritation with another situation, but it only led me to ignoring Craig’s teaching as well.

When we left that night I was disappointed.  I wanted a deeper understanding of the Bible, not a skimming.  So with this evening being our second night, I’m not quite sure if I’ll be returning.

I’m trying to determine if it was entirely my mindset that affected my liking of the lesson or if this really isn’t the platform meant to teach me.

When I left the women’s Bible study on Monday, I felt reenergized, excited, and satiated in having finally found a place to learn and grow on my walk in exactly the way I wanted.

Because I don’t like the Real Discipleship as much, is that a clue to disengage and focus on my Monday night study?  Or is it something I should push through and give directed attention.

God, please guide me and let me know if I should continue on with this class.  I want to learn about You to the best of my ability.  I don’t want to force myself into something and wind up negatively affecting my walk with You.  Please show me what You want for me.

Softly Love Comes Crooning

Above all else, I am a hopeless romantic.

For now and always I will believe that all men possess some Romeo, there are such things as soul mates, and true love never dies.

This is why I am always so happy to see Mr. Willis when he comes into the bank.

“So, Jamie, any news?” he asked, referring to my empty ring finger.

“No, no yet,” I apologetically smiled.

“Geez, what’s wrong with this guy?” the ninety-year-old man laughed.  “Give me his number!  I need to talk to him!”

Both a story teller and a singer, Mr. Willis has a voice much like crooner Frank Sinatra.  Old-fashioned and smooth like wine, his voice is indisputably meant for a different era.  Untouched and unaltered, it owns a purity of warmth and pleasantness.  One of my favorite things about Mr. Willis is that he never fails to use this voice to express just how much he adored his wife.

“You need what happened to me to happen to you – a blind date!”

I stood, staring quizzically.

“My wife and I were a blind date.  My friend knew me, and he had a secretary who had a friend.  They got to talking, discovered we were both single,” he brought his two index fingers together, “and set us up.”

He paused for a moment as he thought.  With a smile, he continued.

“I went over to her house near Rhodes College to pick her up.  She was wearing a beautiful black dress, because we were going to a dinner and a dance.  I took one look at her and I never looked back at the female world.”

My eyes watered, imaging my own future husband having such feelings for me.

“And that’s how it stayed for 47 years until she decided it was time to go somewhere else.”  He quietly pointed to the sky.  “She went up there.”

We smiled at each other, and he asked, “Is this what you want?  You’re sure?”

I nodded, piercing my lips and thinking carefully.

“If it is – if it really is – then never stop saying I love you.  Say it every day.”

And with that, he flashed a thoughtful smile and walked out of the bank, leaving quite an impression of requited love and adoration.

All love is amazing, but Christian love is something unique and special.  I am so happy when God brings Mr. Willis into my life, because he is a sturdy reminder that men like him exist.

There are God-fearing, God-loving, one-woman men who are faithful, passionate, romantic, and steadfast, and striving to glorify God.  And I don’t let go of my dream that someday one will be my husband.

Make my joy complete by being of the same mind, maintaining the same love, united in spirit, intent on one purpose (Philippians 2:2).

A smoldering wick He will not put out, until He leads justice to victory (Matthew 12:20).

He has made everything beautiful in its time (Ecclesiastes 3:11).

Darkness Falls

I suffered deeply Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday and Sunday.

Six days.

For six days, I was in a place so dark I thought I would never be able to escape it.

I cried to myself.  My body wracked with convulsions from sobbing each night.  All I could do was imagine my mom wrapping her arms around me, telling me everything would be okay.

I just want to die, I thought.  The more sadness I felt, the harder I squeezed my eyes shut, wishing away all confusion.

For the first time in a long time, I really wanted to die.

Ravaging, angry thoughts swam through the holes in my mind.  In my tears and desolateness, I was transported back to a very similarly troubled time.

During my high school years, I fell in love with the movie What Dreams May Come with Robin Williams.  It was utterly romantic to see life after death, to envision Cuba Gooding, Jr. leading me through a new world.

But there was a much deeper, darker side.

The suicide side.

The last time I truly thought about suicide was as a teenager in California.

I lived in a house with two parents who fought constantly.  With his gun in tow, my father would often lock himself in the master bedroom and threaten from behind a locked door to commit suicide.

Witnessing this for years in addition to months of rejection and high school heartache, I went rummaging through his closet one day.  There, I found a briefcase.  I remember delicately lifting the top, and removing the revolver from its padding.  I rubbed my fingers over its glazed indentions in admiration and apprehension.  It was the first time I had ever held a gun.

How easy, I deliberated. One sliver of metal could remove me from all my pain.

Terrified of my own thoughts, I placed the gun back in its case, and sat silently, almost breathlessly, on my knees.  Wide-eyed and in shock, I hid the gun back in its closet, hoping my father would never discover my private calculations.

Something happened this weekend.

I pushed God away.  I relinquished my strength and fell into the whispers and lies of the dark.

Spiritual warfare is very real.  How much better the Devil would be if one of God’s soldiers was no longer around to fight the battle.

But even in my darkness, surrounded by my own demons, God was there for me.  Even when I pushed Him away, even when I felt like He was absent, He didn’t let me go.

I listened to Beth Moore a few months ago, she said, “The enemy has a lot at stake at making you think you’re nuts!  He can mess enough with us that we question our own sanity.”

God’s love is more powerful than anything.  Thinking back now, through that blur of six days, I do remember spots of sunshine.  A hummingbird, a hug, a friendly Christian’s unexpected love.  God was there.

He will always be there.

No man shall be able to stand before you all the days of your life; as I was with Moses, so I will be with you; I will not fail you or forsake you (Joshua 1:5).

He will be the sure foundation for your times, a rich store of salvation and wisdom and knowledge; the fear of the Lord is the key to this treasure (Isaiah 33:6).

We also rejoice in our sufferings, because we know that suffering produces perseverance; perseverance, character; and character, hope (Romans 5:3-4).

Our struggle is not against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the powers, against the world forces of this darkness, against the spiritual forces of wickedness in the heavenly places (Ephesians 6:12).

Earth, Air, and Fire

I have been severely depressed for some time now.

When I’m depressed, I don’t reach out.  Instead I pull back and away.  I don’t let anyone in, I don’t send clues.  I just vanish and only if you hunt for me will I open up.  I will not come to you.

In my life, I am constantly surrounded by people, at work, at church, and outside activities.  As I have been sinking, no one has reached out to me.  My boyfriend may not even see how deeply I’ve sunk.  To be so depressed and to have no one reaching out to me, it widens the wound.

In the last few weeks I have subconsciously pinpointed the terms of the current relationships in my life.

And I have prayed.

I have prayed to God that He would bring people into my life to help me.  I want surround myself with the people that will help me search for Him.  I want healthy relationships, relationships based on Christ and love.

Within the last week, God has allowed me some headway.

Earth

Out of everyone at church, this is the only person who asked me where I’ve been and meant it.  Out of friends I have known for months, friends I have seen everyday – he is the one that noticed I’ve been missing.  Whether he meant it as deeply as I took it, I don’t know, but when I started to tell him about what I’ve been going through, he didn’t run away from me.  I really see him being a positive influence in my life.  He possesses a welcoming gentleness and an ability to empathize that I need in a friend.

Air

When Scott told me the benefits of working with another Christian in his place of employment, I didn’t understand.  I didn’t understand the benefits or the camaraderie.  Having this person there helps me stay positive on a daily basis.  I also love having a young, married Christian couple in my life. They show me what Christian love between a man and a woman can be and how they, together, are working for the advancement of God’s kingdom.

Fire

In the beginning, I never anticipated a friendship to arise here.  I thought she was out of my league, too far beyond me to reach out.  God delivers on time, however, and within months, we have been closer.  And that strong Christian influence I was looking for?  I see it in her.  I see her being a leader and being willing and able to reach out for me when I’m fallen.  I see God’s love in her heart, extending past her fingertips and into all the lives of those she touches on a daily basis.  I am so happy our friendship has slowly developed into something beautiful, glorifying God with our love.

I so desperately need these influences in my life, and I can see God in them.  I may not have a multitude of friends, but I do treasure the developing friendships for which I have so desperately prayed.

If you have any encouragement from being united with Christ, if any comfort from his love, if any fellowship with the Spirit, if any tenderness and compassion, then make my joy complete by being like-minded, having the same love, being one in spirit and purpose (Philippians 2:1-2).

A Song From Mars

When I first heard Just the Way You Are by Bruno Mars, Scott and I were in the car on our way home from Dallas.

I instantly fell in love with it.  I hung on every word.  I love the lyrics, the melody, and especially the message.  I pray that God will bring into my life a man who possessing the same feelings of love and adoration of which Bruno Mars sings.

I want to be beautiful to someone.  The song has remained on repeat in my iTunes library and after the fiftieth time of hearing it, I slowly realized I already am beautiful to someone.  I’m searching for a love I already have.

I imagine God saying these things to me, reminding me I’m beautiful and I am His, whether I see it or not.

She’s so beautiful                    And I tell her every day          Yeah, I know, I know              When I compliment                  She won’t believe me              And it’s so, it’s so sad to think She don’t see what I see        But every time she asks me    Do I look okay, I say               When I see your face             There’s not a thing that          I would change                        ‘Cause you’re amazing            Just the way you are              And when you smile,                The whole world stops           And stares for a while             ‘Cause girl you’re amazing       Just the way you are

I made you I show you every day in little and big ways I know you I love you every day I know you’ve been broken by others and it’s difficult for you to see But don’t be sad I know your heart I know your prayers and questions I will always say I made you, I love you I made you exactly you I made you everything you are You are everything I designed I made you just the way you are I love when you smile Don’t worry of the world Don’t worry of the world You’re Jamie I made you just the way you are

She’s so beautiful                    And I tell her every day Oh, you know, you know I’d never ask you to change If perfect is what u r searching for Then just stay the same So don’t even bother asking If you look okay You know I’d say When I see your face There’s not a thing that I would change ‘Cause you’re amazing Just the way you are And when you smile,  The whole world stops And stares for a while ‘Cause girl you’re amazing Just the way you are

You are beautiful to me I show you every day I know, I know You are beautiful how I made you You are not perfect, but perfectly made So don’t struggle over something unattainable So do not despair Because you are beautiful to me I am here for you always I made you I made you I made you I made you Just the way you are Smile for Me I made the world For you You are My Jamie I love you just the way you are

How wonderful it is to have a God that loves us just as much as we love Him.  He is the ideal.  I need to love Him completely and trust that He will bring into my life an honorable man who wants to glorify Him and, in doing so, will adore and love his future wife.

Love was not made to be bland, but to excite the senses, awakening us daily to God and reminding us of His true love for us.

Hungry

Everything rides on hope now
Everything rides faith somehow
When the world has broken me down
Your love sets me free
You've become my hearts desire
I will sing Your praises higher
Cause Your love sets me free

I have really been praying about the next chapter of my life.

When Scott and I first started coming to Hope in February, I was not truly hungry for a relationship with God.

Now, several months later, not only am I hungry, but starving!

I have this deep longing and need to know God and to learn about Him.  I can’t walk through the Bible on my own; I need to be led, to be taught.  Nothing has been fulfilling that aspect of my life, and this is why I am so excited about these upcoming months.

Last night I went to the introduction of the women's book studies at Hope.  Between Revelation with Beth Moore, Fearless by Max Lucado, and 30 Days to Understanding the Bible by Max Anders, I chose the latter.

We’ll meet every Monday until March.  It’s quite a commitment, and as I sat alone in the South Hall looking at my registration card, I almost didn’t sign up.  Overwhelmed and fearful, I almost walked away.  I’m glad I didn’t.

On Wednesday nights at Hope, a large group of us will be meeting for Real Discipleship.  I’m hoping this will also feed my spiritual appetite.

I am truly excited and ready to move on with this journey.  After months of feeling stagnant and lost, I feel like this could be the path destined to further develop my foundation.

I lift up my eyes to the hills – where does my help come from? My help comes from the Lord, the Maker of heaven and earth (Psalm 121:1-2).

Now that we know what we have – Jesus, this great High Priest with ready access to God – let’s not let it slip through our fingers (Hebrews 4:14).

Godly Goals

Join Independent

Read a fourth of the Bible

Attend a regular Bible Study

Grow in the Word

Go on a Mission Trip

Be a part of a project that serves the local community

Continue to have a God-centered relationship with Scott

Introduce others to my God-centered life

Spend more quiet time with God

Find a balance between everything

Talk to God more

Focus on God more

Develop more Christian friendships

Develop more non-Christian friendships

Empty my quiver

Disciple Gallery

Tonight Scott took me to downtown Memphis for an exhibit at the Disciple Gallery on Main Street.  Craig Thompson, the photographer who accompanied those on Hope’s mission to Haiti, showcased his photographs from the trip.

As we approached the gallery, I didn’t know what to expect.

Several pictures hung on the walls.  Faces from Haiti were illuminated, eyes filled with deep, rich emotion.

On the other side of these faces were those from Hope Church who had traveled many, many miles to help their Haitian brothers and sisters.

As more of our congregation filed into the old brick building, I was in awe.

I felt so much admiration looking out into the crowd, but not the admiration I had expected.

I had imagined heroes, outspoken characters possessing superhuman strength, witty two word comebacks, robed in an air of superiority.

But looking into their faces, I saw none of what I imagined.

I saw unspoken, understated heroes.  Regular people stood before me.  Average Joes admired the photographs and God’s work.  Humble and warm, I saw their lives touched by God’s love, not a people saluting their own strength.

To see 34 people enacting all for the glory of God was an amazing experience.

I left the gallery feeling inspired, full of admiration, and completely thankful to God for touching all our lives so introspectively, specifically, and outwardly.  It is an amazing God we serve, and we are all so blessed for Craig’s gift.  He certainly captured some of the most precious moments to share with all of us.

The Comet

I can't tell you what it really is

I can only tell you what it feels like

And right now it's a steel knife in my windpipe

I can't breathe but I still fight while I can fight

As long as the wrong feels right it's like I'm in flight

Ever since I can remember, I’ve loved being able to drive.  It offers so much freedom to have a car, some time, and good music.  Some of my favorite memories are still crisp in my mind.

I remember my 1985 Thunderbird and my mom’s 1993 Cougar.  Those summers in California with weekend drives to Tracy were thrilling  The windows down, Kylie Minogue in the background, my hair flying in every direction – it’s a feeling I’ve held onto for many years.

However, with those highs come the lows.

For me, those lows are wet nights where the pavement glistens like black glass and the rain falls heavy, blurring the clarity of my thoughts.

I grip the steering wheel, contemplating unbuckling.  It would be so easy right now, I think.  What do I mean by that?  Just to speed off recklessly, find a turn, and just twist the wheel.

A part of me always wonders what would happen.  Would I hit the curb just right?  Would I die?  Suffer an injury instead?  Or would I emerge only with some scrapes?

In my younger years, I loved One Tree Hill, a drama on CW.  The girl I identified with was Peyton Sawyer, a lost soul.  Peyton loved an eclectic assortment of music, hated cheerleading, was very artistic, and owned a black Comet.  After losing her mother, she fell into a deep depression. 

On one episode, I watched as she drove through red light after red light.

 

"She was driving to school to pick me up. She was late, so she ran a red light. It was one light at the wrong split second and it ended for her,” she explained to Luke.  "My mom ran one red light. I run them all the time and nothing happens."

Being in a car late at night in the rain is a very scary place for me.  This is the only place that these thoughts tend to come to mind.

A car is a very unique place to feel your depression.  You feel in control, you find strength in your weakness.  But it’s a lie.

I’m fighting with these thoughts.  God, please help me with this.  I know no good can come of what I think in these particular instances.  I just feel so weak at times.  Please help me seek you.

Teach me to do your will, for you are my God; may your good Spirit lead me on level ground (Psalm 143:10).

And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus (Philippians 4:7).

Prayer

Dear God,

I'm so sad right now. I have several moments where I feel my face crumple and I want so badly to cry, but I can't. I want to crawl into bed and just bawl until I fall asleep. I am so stressed right now. My life isn't anything I wanted it to be at twenty-five. I wanted to married. I wanted to be loved. I wanted to have a job I enjoy. Every day that is slipping away from me. If this is Your will, please just hold me and guide me, because I feel so desperately lost.

I don't talk to my family. I pull away from friends. Scott doesn't understand or have time to care. I hide from You. Why do I pull away if I seek love? That doesn't make sense! Why am I so confused? I'm lonely.

Just like Richie Sessions was talking about a restart button last Sunday -- I wish I had just that! I wish I could start my life over. I'd go back to college. I'd wait for the man of my dreams. I'd love You. I'd know you from the start. Oh, how desperately I want to feel Your love.

I feel further from You now than before. I feel so alone.

Please help me.

Jamie

Old Gardens

Does anybody hear her?  Can anybody see?

Or does anybody even known she’s going down today

Under the shadow of our steeple

With all the lost and lonely people

Searching for the hope that’s tucked away in you and me

When I first moved to Memphis four years ago, I had few friends.  Of those few, some became good friends of mine.  We were close then, bonded by our lives, sharing our days, laughing and crying.  Yet, as time has a tendency to do, its passing years and struggles have separated our ties.

Sometimes we cross paths like people do.  Our evenings together may feel familiar, like slipping into an old comfortable shirt, but mostly it feels new.  In the years that have passed, we sit across from new people in new lives with new perspectives.

For months previous to today, a particular friend and I had been trying to reconnect.  The plans presented always worked for one, but not the other.  It was not in God’s plan to have us reconnect just yet.

So when I felt a small push to text her today, I went with it.  Low and behold, the same plans that had failed before suddenly offered ripe opportunity.  The stars aligned, God ordained it, and we met for drinks in what little time we had.

Had we met months ago, I wouldn’t have been in the right state of mind.  Where selfishness reigned wholeheartedly, it has recently dwindled some, allowing forgiveness and grace as supplements.

If old loves are old flames, then old friends are old gardens.  Some remain nourished and in full bloom, others withered and dead beyond rescue and, still, some with a spot of life lingering in them.  Those are the ones of which we attend that may re-bud, re-bloom, and grace our lives with unexpected beauty.

I want to pray for this friend.  Dear God, I pray for You to shelter her heart and to help her through what difficult times may lay ahead.  I pray for her family’s welfare and that You may guide them and open their hearts to Your newest gift.  Please help her relationship with her significant other to grow in You, compelling him to be a righteous future-husband and to care for her, protect her, and honor her.  I pray You keep her spiritually, emotionally, and physically strong.  Your love can only make her stronger.  Thank You for our gift of friendship, and please help me and us have a community within one another.  Please help me reach out to her. Please let those around me reach out to her.  Keep her reaching for me, for You.  Thank you, God, for bringing us together today.  You are an amazing God whose punctuality is sometimes unnerving, always amazing, and truly compassionate..  I love you.