Here it is.
The quiet that I’ve been avoiding for the last three months.
It is in this quiet that all the lulled hurt comes rushing back for me to face.
How can he be over me? How could he move on so quickly? What does he really think of me? What rumors is he spreading? Where are the people who I spent the last year of my life with? Where is the family I knew? How is this all possible? What about everything we had? How can he not think of me?
In my heart, I know that none of my questions matter. I hear God’s soft voice tenderly reminding me that He loves me. It is His love only that matters. Yet, God, I am still hurting.
Please take this pain away from me. Please remove it. Please heal me. Please let me glorify You in all this overwhelming pain. Heal my heart. Let Your love overwhelm. Please, please, please. I beg You, God. I know You are the only one capable of mending me. I’m tired of running. I’m exhausted. I’m tired of the persecution, the loneliness, the betrayal, the hurt, the timidity, the sorrow. It is the sorrow that has shattered me. Please heal me, Lord. Please take my heart away from this pain.
Broken I run to You for Your arms are open wide
I am weary, but I know Your touch restores my life
So I wait for You
So I wait for You
I’m falling on my knees
Offering all of me
Jesus, You’re all this heart is living for
